Selfish For Love
by awesomeanimelover98
Summary: "I wish I wish with all my heart to live with anime in a land apart." A wish was made and so it was granted. Not by any normal girl though. This girl was Yuzuki, a deaf girl who just wants to be loved, maybe a bit to much though. Jealous of her twin sister Yuki, Yuzuki doesn't always make the right choices as she tries to decide what she really wants. (trying out new summaries)
1. Wish

**Prologue: Wish**

"When your heart is broken and your life is falling apart what is there left to do besides wish?" Those were the last words my grandma would say to me. Those were the last words I ever heard. I was ten when I went deaf in an accident. The doctors told me I was never going to hear again. I don't think it was the accident that caused it though. I think it was losing my grandma. My parents and I were never close, I never had any friends, and so when the night came and I made my wish, I knew I wouldn't miss anyone.

Finishing dinner, I left my family, feeling their eyes on me as I got up and went to my room. As always, I stomped, my family liked to tell themselves and others that I just couldn't hear how loud I was being, but really, I just knew it annoyed them and if they were fine with lying then I was fine with not arguing with them, I mean I couldn't really argue with them anyways the words never made sense coming out of my mouth.

Laying in bed I stared at my ceiling until a bright light shined in the corner of my eyes stealing my sight fully when I looked out. It was almost like having a flashlight shined in my eyes for a second it was so bright. Then it started falling, my grandmother's words echoed in my ears as it always did, and I made the wish I always made when I got the chance to wish. "I wish, I wish, with all my heart, to stay with anime in a land apart." My lips formed the words but no sound left me.

I know, who wishes for anime when they could wish for their hearing back? Well obviously, me, because at least in an anime I feel like I could break my mental trauma and be able to hear again. I mean anime don't ever make sense, so wouldn't it make sense for that to be possible? Noticing the realistic world around me, I give up and close my eyes and get comfortable in bed, falling asleep an hour later.


	2. Yuzuki

**Chapter One: Yuzuki**

 **It's cold.** _ **White snow**_ **. What is white? What is snow?** _ **Something that is not red.**_ **So, then what is red?**

"Are you lost little girls? I want to drink your blood."

 _ **Beast in human form who drink the blood of living humans, they are**_

"A disgrace to all vampires."

 _ **Vampires. You must never get close to a vampire.**_

"Is everything all, right?"

 _ **If you do their gaze will enslave you.**_

The words from that night haunt me in my dreams. I have no idea how I know what was said. As long as I remember I haven't been able to hear but those words, those were the words I remember from the night Yuki and I began our life's.

 _This is Cross Academy a famous private school where all the students live on campus in the dorms._

Seeing my sister step up in front of the troubling girls, I already know what she's going to say. Everyday it's the same. Past curfew, stalkers, annoying presence. Okay, Yuki wouldn't say those things but she should because those girls are crazy and have problems. They take pictures of the night class students, they stalk them, they create violence, and are just so annoying, and I wish I didn't have to deal with them.

Walking through the crowd I quickly reach the front, just as four girls surround my sister. I end up get the gist of what is being said and I know they are just assuming things, well you know what? Assuming makes an ass of a person, so it's better not to do it. Stepping in front of the day class students I quickly push them all back just as they start pushing forward on Yuki. My glare, sent towards girls trying to push forward, sends them back to the pack as everyone knows I will not hesitate to kick anyone's ass for them breaking the rules.

If they won't listen to the rules I have no problem making them learn from breaking them. Felling the familiar shaking of the gates I notice Yuki is still trying to get some girls back, the look on her face, the look of defeat, causes me to smile. If she wasn't so nice to them they would move but Yuki tries to talk to them instead, she's to nice. Since I can't talk though I make it clear what happens by example.

Awkwardly I back away from the girls as they all line up in nice neat rows as the night class arrives. Yuki's face is priceless and I'm sure everyone hears me laughing even if I can't. Hanabusa parades in front of the group greeting the girls, a slight wink from him assures me he knows why I'm laughing. He just has that way with the ladies and he knows it.

Suddenly he starts pointing at people. So, while Kaname is helping Yuki up I'm slowly walking over towards the two with my fingers like Hanabusa. The look on Kaname's face when he realizes I'm trying to figure out what Hanabasa is doing causes me to blush, as I realize Kaname is trying not to laugh at me. Instead he pats me on the head and says "Bang." Reading his lips, I realize with embarrassment that Hanabusa was using a gun and the girls were all just being weird.

Feeling the glares of the girls on Yuki and me, Yuki awkwardly turns around, as Kaname's lips form thank you's for me and her working our best. Nodding I give him a smile and tilt my head in a way asking if he was done talking now. He nods his head and so as if I had flipped a switch the glare I sent the girls behind me made them back up at least five feet from me and my sister. Feeling Zero's presence, I turn around to see him holding Kaname's wrist away from Yuki and he was glaring. Not again Zero. Kaname always gets upset after talking to Zero. You would think them both being vampires it would make them okay with each other's company but instead it seems to be the complete opposite.

Before I could grab Kaname's hand to stop him from walking away, some other girls brush past me instead. Taking that as a sign to not do anything, I back away. The sight of girl's running away alerts me to Zero doing his job. It made me wonder why he couldn't have made them disappear sooner but who am I to judge? I don't always do my job either. Turning, I see Yuki beating up Zero. Instead of doing something though I shake my head and get some other girls to back away and start pushing them in the direction of the dorms.

After the girls were sent off I went to my favorite tree to watch the night class. It was my job to directly observe them and keep watch of those in the classroom. Zero and Yuki patrol and I just watch, most nights. I can't hear people coming but I can watch people easily and sense vampires. So, it just makes my job a hundred percent easier, since I was basically just backing up Kaname.

Watching Hanabusa as he drew caused me to let out a slight laugh and the only sign that Kaname heard it through the open window was a movement in his shoulders but that could've been for anything. Reading their lips, I knew Hanabusa was threatening Zero and Yuki again. My response to him was throwing a twig at the window causing him to mention I was not included in his list but he wasn't changing his opinion of Zero and Yuki. Everyone's head turned slightly and I knew whatever they were saying they were hiding from me, so when Kaname stood, I could only assume it was to answer them.

Watching Ruka hurt Hanabusa, I began to laugh, so for my own safety I got out of my tree. Looking at my watch I realized it was time for the meeting with Dad and so I ran all the way there. By the time, I got to his office I was interrupting Zero. I could tell because his face showed all the signs of him complaining. Dad started going on about why we can't have any other members in the disciplinary committee. All of a sudden Zero breaks the desk and dad starts crying. The disappointment I had for him came out in the one word that left my mouth. "Dad."

Watching Yuki jump out the window I see Dad crying again. Yuki. Why can't you just call him dad? He wasn't always a headmaster. We don't know who are real dad is. We're just a couple of twins suffering in the silent hole left in our memory's. Why won't she make the best of it and create a new family? That night Kaname saved us was the night we became a new family. Kaname is the reason we are alive today, he is the reason we have a family, but he is not our whole world. We have Dad because of him. Why won't she see more than just Kaname?

Dad's arms are around me as he cries, so I just pat his back waiting for him to stop. When he finally stops, he grabs a piece of paper and starts scribbling. Waiting patiently, I accept the pad of paper when he gives it to me. Yuzuki, you are the only one that loves daddy. Forming a heart with my hands and giving him a smile is my only response before I'm crushed in another hug. I'm sure he's squealing how much he loves me just like he does with Yuki when he hugs her but I wouldn't know. I'm kinda deaf.

As someone with no hearing, I was at the front of the class away from my sister and Zero so when the teacher goes to wake them up I had no idea what they were saying but I understand what Yuki said, since she was facing me and pointing. "Hey! Don't include Yuzuki in that! She didn't do anything wrong! She doesn't deserve detention!" Detention?! Grabbing my cow bell I start ringing it causing the teacher to look at me. When he noticed my glare, he knew I knew what he did but he didn't say anything to me. At least not till he got back down to the front of the room and he cleared it up that I didn't have detention.

With that being cleared up I left the classroom and headed to the Moon dorm. Time to trade for that drawing of Zero from Hanabusa before the switch over. Waving at the gate keeper I walk to the entrance; glad I beat the traffic. Walking in like I own the place Ruka gives me a glare and the other students watch me carefully. Raising up my notepad I search for the right one. In colorful words and a little chibi of him I hold up a sign saying. Hanabusa. Seeing Ruka's lips twitch I knew she was just mocking me but I also knew she knew there would be no satisfaction in her saying anything because I wouldn't actually hear it.

Someone must've called for him while I watched Ruka though because before I knew it he was in front of me. Smiling I flip my page already prepared for this conversation. Zero picture? I like to keep things short. It wasn't that I couldn't form full sentences or anything. I just can't make cute bubble letters with full sentences. "You mean the one from my notebook, the one Ruka was judging?" Nodding my head, I confirm. Pulling out my drawing pad I offer it to him. Since this is a regular thing, we already know the routine.

He flips to the new ones and finds a Rima and Shiki picture that I drew after the whole catching a tablet thing from last night. An awe escapes his lips and his faces just squishes up. "Rima and Shiki sitting in a tree." Laughing silently, I nod my head. Pulling out a non-scribbled version of the Zero picture he hands it to me and I get a good laugh as he rips the drawing from my book and proceeds to skip over to the two in the drawing, obviously, he planned to make fun of them. So, with that I waved to no one and then left. Just in time for the girls to start showing up for the switch over.

Watching the night class with Zero and Yuki was different because I wasn't able to really watch the night class because I didn't want to be left out of Zero and Yuki's conversations. Following the flow, I end up jumping with Yuki to go and confront the day class students but I took a safer route. A bit slower honestly, but I didn't get hurt. Letting Yuki scold them, I act as back up before I felt two Vampires join us. Pulling out two yo-yo's I fling them out towards the presence. Knowing they were here for blood, sparks seemed to fly from the yo-yo's as they got close to the vampires.

I almost regretted almost hurting Hanabusa but his words towards Yuki were unforgivable. Watching Kain and Hanabusa, I didn't approve of the closeness towards Yuki but I wasn't going to attack unless necessary. The second I saw Hanabusa's fangs I hit him with the yo-yo's and he immediately dropped Yuki's had and dropped to the floor. My weapon is meant to stun not wound but Zero appeared ready to fire at Hanabusa before I hit Zero's gun with my yo-yo's causing his shot to hit a tree instead. Prepared to attack Kain or protect him from Zero I move in-between everyone.

Kaname's presence was made known and I immediately put up my weapons and turned to face him nodding, an expression of discontent clear on my face. Watching him I saw him talking to Zero but I knew Yuki would get him to put the gun down so I didn't worry too much. I was just looking forward to the moment where he got rid of the other two vampires in the area. They caused to many problems tonight and I was not happy.

Kaname apologizes to Yuki and then looks at me apologizing for not intervening sooner and for Hanabusa's actions, since Kaname knows I don't like that a friend hurt my sister. Zero drags Yuki away almost like he forgot me so I don't follow. Watching Kaname I watch his eyes follow Yuki and a pain in my heart is felt but I refuse to let it show especially when I notice his eyes are on me again. Kaname walks till he is directly in front of me blocking my view of the other vampires.

His hand on my chin lifting my face up and refusing to let me see what goes on around us. Only seeing him. "I'm sorry if you were afraid. I wish Yuki didn't get hurt but I surely am glad that you did not get hurt at all." Kaname. The only word in my mind and in my heart. If only I was the one in his heart. "Maybe now is not the time to say this but I hope you visit me more. I feel lonely ever since you started distancing yourself from me."

It will only end in heartbreak. That's what I keep telling myself, but I can't say no to Kaname, that's why I tried to avoid being alone with him. I knew he wouldn't make these requests in front of Yuki or the other girls in the day class. Nodding my head I can only agree to visit him. "Visit me this weekend, Yuzuki." My name on his lips. I'm sure if I heard it I would've melted. Another nod and then he left.


	3. Zero

**Chapter 2: Zero**

Being deaf has it's perks. Seeing Yori's face I just know I'm not missing out on anything. The girl's are just squealing and discussing St. Xocolatl's day. Looking over I notice Yuki's chocolate book, slowly I slide it over to me. At some point I guess Yori and Yuki notice I have the book because I look up to them staring at me. Before anyone can say anything to me though I feel Zero's glare on the three of us.

I send a questioning glance his way. "You're a member of the disciplinary Committee and yet you two are giving him a gift?" Shaking my head I just shrug my shoulders. Yuki seems to freak out a bit though if her exaggerated gestures are anything to go by. Then she get's embarrassed and I can see her whole face go red when she glances down at the book still in my hands.

For me this year was going to be different. I was going to make two people chocolates, I was going to make three but someone attacked my sister. Zero, Kaname, the two guys in my life that both love my sister, she shouldn't get both of them though. That's not fair. How would it be fair? I know I'm deaf and sometimes need more protecting than Yuki but I also deserve love and attention like Yuki gets.

Maybe if I ask Zero to help me make some for Yuki and Yori he can teach me so I can make some for him and kaname. He might not be to happy if he finds out I want to make some for Kaname though, so maybe I can give Kaname his another day.

"So then tomorrow is St. Xocolatl's day. The entire school is buzzing with excitement. The truth about the night class could be revealed in all this frenze. I need you all to be more alert than usual, is that understood guardians?" Nodding, I agree with father. Yuki solutes and Zero questions everything. Just making this conversation go on longer than normal. I know he doesn't like Vampires and all but still. Without this event some people would be to awkward to even hint at feelings towards someone. Like me. How am I to just write out I like you to Zero or Kaname? That's too much work. Plus this holiday isn't about saying I like you it's about saying I think I like you for single people. Or that's what it is to me this year.

Seeing the glare Zero sends father I quickly gather that the headmaster was praising the vampires again and Zero was trying not to beat him up again. It's crazy how father was a vampire hunter and yet he acts the way he does now. So carefree and childish. It's amazing me and Yuki survived.

When father turns to face the window I try to see a reflection of his face so I can read his lips but finding none I glance over at Yuki and Zero, only to find them listening to him. Which means he's talking and I don't know what he's saying. I'll just wait till it's over and ask Zero for a summary and then ask him to help me make chocolate. Distracting me from my thoughts I see Yuki climb on father's desk and pull out a bunch of papers. Fighting my smile I shake my head. She's such a child, then she hands me and Zero our own bunches of paper.

Get out of work free cards. So she gave me cards so I can slack. Oh I am so using one for tomorrow. I don't have to hear the girls to know they're going to be a lot worse, they get so much more violent and rebellious on this day. Suddenly Yuki grabs my arm with Zero's arm in her other hand and she's dragging us out. Father seems happy about his gift and doesn't even seem to notice us leaving.

At the switch over Yuki tries to tame the wild crowd while I just glared and pushed the crowd back, sliding in a couple of elbows to the girl's who pushed back. Feeling something was wrong I turn around only to see Zero holding a girl princess style. A slight frown formed on my lips. When he said that the event might be canceled though I knew I didn't have to worry about other girls. He makes everyone hate him, he keeps his distance, and I'm sure if I could hear what he said to people over half the time it would be nothing but rude comments.

When the gates open and the Night class comes out I immediately start pushing against the girls even more. Looking behind me my eyes search for the only vampire I truly trust with my life. Kaname. Seeing him I follow his line of sight only to see it land on my sister. Of course. Looking back at him I see him say greeting to Yuki before he continued walking. He stopped and locked eyes with Zero. Still he doesn't look at me. Looking away I give up on him acknowledging me. A pain in my chest making me acutely aware of my disappointment

When the switchover is complete I walk over to Zero, my request already written out. Zero? Will you do me a big favor? I wanted to do something for Yuki and Yori. Making sure not to mention that it's chocolate until I get him to think it's for Yuki and Yori I wait watching his expression. He seems upset. I'll ask him about it after this. I prepared this all day, no getting distracted. "Sure Yuzuki, what do you need." His expression seems to soften as he let's out a sigh. I want to make them chocolate. I can already see the protest coming on but grabbing his right hand in both of mine, dropping my notebook and pencil, I give him my best puppy dog face, begging him silently.

Sighing, he looks away, a slight nod from his head is the only answer I get. I wait till he looks back at me though to let go of his hand. "Alright fine, I'll help you make the chocolate." Smiling up at him I jump up in joy. I'll learn how to make non deadly chocolate now! Doing a small happy dance I throw my arms in the air.

We'll have to wait for Yuki to finish first, that shouldn't take long though. "Yeah, she'll probably give up and go buy some after one failed attempt." Nodding my head I drag him off towards Fathers home and straight to the living room. So what were you upset about, earlier? Shaking his head, he doesn't answer. His lips tightly sealed shut. Please, don't shut me out. I know all there is to know, except what's going on in your mind. "Kaname is taunting me, he knows and he's not making it easy for me." I feel anger spring up inside of me. Do you need me to get mad at him? I'll do it. "I can fight my own battles thank you very much. He's just getting on my nerves. Plus I don't want him to know you know. He'd use that against you somehow."

As much as I want to deny it, I really don't know if that's true or not. I don't want to chance it either. Do you need a drink? I ask him hesitantly writing it. Knowing it angers him. He looks away and I can already see how desperate he is. It's been a month. It's alright, Zero. Taking his hand I guide him up stairs to a bathroom, to avoid being seen by Yuki or father. In my other hand my notebook and pencil. I know a part of him hates himself for this but he realizes the need in him.

After I made sure the door was locked, I sit on the sink counter and take off my top until I'm left in my tank top. Grabbing his hand I pull him towards me. "I'm sorry." Nodding my head, I wait as he lowers his mouth to my shoulder. The smart move between us is for him to not bite on my neck or wrist, places that are easy to expose. At least here I know Kaname can't just happen upon it. Feeling his teeth sink into my skin I clench my fist on the edge of the sink before making an attempt at relaxing.

The night father brought Zero home I knew what had happened. A bad vampire had killed his family. He had so much blood on his neck, but no wound. It was a pureblood. I had asked Kaname many questions about vampires when Yuki wasn't around. So when Zero had shown up I knew right away. Taking him to the bathroom, I didn't dare to say anything. I made Yuki go away after she told him I was deaf, taking my time I worked silently on cleaning off the blood. Making over exaggerated movements to make sure he knew what I was going to do.

I stayed by his side helping him with everything. Even when it was clear he didn't need my help. He stayed silent though. We stayed together in a peaceful silence. It was how we became close. At night I would stay with him and sleep in his room with him. In case he needed someone. Sometimes we would stay up together all night because he was scared and I would just stroke his head. Trying to sooth his pain. Trying to sooth the monster in him.

There was never any clear conversation between us on when I found out what he was, or my opinion on it. It was like we both knew I knew, so when I saw him suffering two years in I knew what I had to do. For him, I would do anything. I'm sure that if Yuki was doing the same for him though he'd be even more happy. I see the way he looks at her. It's the same way Kaname looks at her. Maybe he wouldn't let her do this for him though, maybe it's his love for her that makes him stay away from her. He doesn't want to hurt her but he's okay with it if it's me.

A hand on my cheek brings me out of my thoughts. "Don't be sad, I'm done hurting you." His thumb wipes away a stray tear. Shocked I bring my hands up to my face and wipe away the tears. I didn't know I was crying. Taking a wet red wash rag Zero starts cleaning me up, before taking a bandage and covering up where he bit me. When he's finished he wraps his arms around me. I feel his chin moving, so I know he says something but when he let's me go and I ask him about it he just shakes his head and doesn't answer me. "Let's go make those chocolates for Yuki and Yori." Nodding my head I get off the sink and start getting dressed again. When I'm dressed we go back downstairs.

Pulling out my hidden ingredients, hidden, so Yuki wouldn't find them, I put everything out on the counter. A hand on my chin caused me to look at Zero. He was close to my face causing me to blush a bit, the thoughts that rushed through my head at his action was embarrassing. For a second I thought he would kiss me. "I'll cut up the chocolate, so you get the water to a boil and mix the other ingredients together."

It was easy to get lost in my thoughts as we made the sweet treats, we both tried a piece enjoying it, the aroma wasn't enough for our taste buds, we needed to actually try a bite. The chocolate was delicious. Smiling I put the chocolates into pink and yellow bags. Pink for Yuki and Yellow for Yori. Signing them I put from Yuzuki and Zero on the card, not letting him know I gave him credit. Zero left afterwards, leaving me to 'clean up' in truth I worked on my own to make chocolates special for Zero and Kaname.

For Kaname I made mint white chocolate, using edible decorations though I put little hearts on it, a little card was in the little bag saying tis the season, signed Yuzuki. For Zero, I made a crispy chocolate ball and then dipped strawberries in the leftover chocolate from the Yuki and Yori batch, before using some icing to make tic tac toe shapes on the three strawberries. Packaging and cleaning everything up, I finish and I head to my room in the house, not wanting to go back to the dorms. In the morning I hand Yuki and Yori there's before skipping off to give Zero his. Before he could refuse though I went to my respected seat and prepared for class to start.

Before the switch over I went straight to the night classes class room and to where Kaname sits, placing the chocolate there quickly I run off to the moon dorm gates, realizing I'm so late to my duties that the game's already began. Ugh, Yuki's gonna have my head after this. Quickly, I move into place preventing the girls from getting past their respected gates. Looking around I notice Zero surrounded by three girls, he seems to be turning down their chocolate. One of them get's mad and turns around to point at me angrily. That's when I saw he had my chocolate with him and he actually seemed to be eating it instead of working.

When the day students have cleared I decide to follow Zero around, he's still moody even after the blood yesterday, so I need to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid. When it gets later though I separate and go to check on the night class. Looking through the window at Kaname I see him searching the trees, when his eyes land on me, he smiles and holds up the bag of treats. Sending him a smile I look behind him, noticing most of the students missing. Then it clicks. Zero! He probably said something rude to Kaname, they always do stupid things like this when Zero is rude! Not so many go though!

Waving a little with a forced smile I jump down from my tree and make my way towards where Zero was earlier. Soon I feel familiar vampire presence, jumping out in from of Hanabusa, I slip and fall onto my rear end, a moan of pain escapes me, as I look around at everyone. Not even bothering to mess with my weapons I look around seeing the vampires laughing, even Zero doesn't look angry anymore. "I don't want to fight now. Yuzuki ruined the mood." Hanabusa said looking straight at me. I pout though, knowing he's saying it to make fun of me.

Holding out a hand though Hanabusa offers to help me up as the ice clears. Taking his offer, I let him help me up. As soon as I'm up though Zero snatches me away from him though. Everyone took that as there sign to leave so the vampires left, leaving me and Zero alone. "Don't accept his help." Zero tells me, a glare on his face. With no pencil or notepad with me all I can do is shrug my shoulders. The glare leaves his face as he puts his hand on my head. "Thanks for the chocolate." Removing his hand he puts his forehead against mine. At this moment though he suddenly steps back, looking around I notice Yuki. Before I could think about anything she grabs me by the arm and pulls me along while she walks backwards, She was scolding me for being late to my duty. Before she could get to far into dragging me I start waving my coupons that she gave me.


	4. Kaname

**Chapter 3: Kaname**

Leaning my head on Yuki, I stare at father with my eyes barely open. "Here's my own Tuna carpaccio with marinated tomatoes and a pinch of parsley. I've also made my beef filet with vegetables in a lovely cream sauce! These are all dishes of my own creation!" He seemed so happy but I was to tired to eat today. I was so tired. Yuki kept moving as she began to eat but I ignored it and tried to get comfortable. All of a sudden a flash of light broke through my eyelids. Sitting up I notice father had a camera and was talking about how we are doing our duties as full fledged members of the Disciplinary Committee. I was confused but too tired to try and get him to explain it.

Kicking in doors, stealing photos, fighting off fans, and repeat. I don't think so. I started helping them but I wasn't in the mood to keep on doing this. Pulling out my coupons when Zero was gone I give Yuki a get out of work card and quickly skip out of the building. Good a time as any for me to go and hang out with Kaname I guess. I wasn't going to be stuck dealing with those drama queens anymore and the day class president was getting on my nerves. I can practically feel their complaints. Their sound waves were becoming a solid force to be reckoned with.

Waving to the gatekeeper, he gives me a slight nod and let's me waltz on through the gates like he always does when I go to visit Hanabusa. I should probably make him apologize so we can start mending the friendship that only I see a problem with. Opening the door with a loud bang I alert everyone to my presence. Though to my surprise everyone was already awake and in their PJ's and in the lounge, when I walked in Kaname's back was to me but immediately he turned around. When he saw me a smile grazed his lips. Everyone else seemed either annoyed, bothered, or just to tired to care. Ruka was very annoyed. Shrugging my shoulders toward Ruka's reaction I didn't pay attention to Hanabusa sneaking up on me until his arms were around me.

Quickly I break free of his grip and turn around to face him before I could do anything to him I can feel Kaname's glare, Hanabusa gulps as he realizes the glares being directed at him. A smirk formed on my face. When Hanabusa sees it he loses his fearful look and rolls his eyes. "Whatever don't get cocky because Lord Kaname is mad at me for touching Yuki." Looking at him, I gave him the 'are you sure that's the only reason' look. "Alright fine, it's also for me being rude to you the other day and telling you I didn't regret hurting someone you care about. I realized afterwards that I may not like Yuki, but you are my friend and I wouldn't be to happy if you hurt someone I care about. So, yeah." Pulling out my notebook I start writing. You are the epitome of apologetic.

Before Hanabusa could respond Kaname stole his attention and he got back to saying whatever he was saying. From people's reactions it seems the sun dorms aren't the only ones getting searched. Moving down a couple lines on my notebook paper I write three very important words, rip out the paper, and stuff it in Hanabusa's PJ pocket. His hand pats the pocket while he keeps his eyes trained on Kaname. Great now I get to hang out with tired vampires for the day. I might end up preferring my perfect duties.

Noticing Akatsuki approaching us I turn to watch him talk to Hanabusa. "Hey, Hanabusa." The two of the head off to who knows where and I move over to stand next to Kaname before he let's the night class break off and do their own thing. Pulling on his sleeve I get his attention. "Ah, Yuzuki, so you are here for me. For a minute there I thought you were just here for Hanabusa again." Tilting my head, confused by the look in his eyes, I'm quick to shake my head and open my notebook again. You wanted to hang out this weekend, I got out of work to come see you. :D Some weird part of me decided to add a smiley face even though he could clearly see me smiling at him.

"Let's go to my room then and then we can have some time to hang out today, I'm disappointed that you are leaving Yuki to do all the work herself but very happy that you kept your word to me and are here." Nodding my head I take his hand and begin leading the way before he moves a bit faster so he is leading the way. It doesn't become a race like I would have liked because quite quickly Kaname is stopping at Hanabusa's open door.

"Hanabusa if the dorm president finds these things." Hanabusa snatches a fork from Akatsuki, says something, and then turns before he freezes on the sight of me and Kaname in the doorway. "I don't want your crap-" Akatsuki says before he fully faces the doorway, are they talking about all the weird things Hanabusa collects? Looking at Kaname I assume my guess is correct. "Dorm President Kuran." Hanabusa chokes out. He seems so scared. Kaname seems to have his face normalish again. "Aido I'd like to speak with you know about our dorms regulations." Kaname narrows his eyes. "It seems you need to be reminded of them."

Hanabusa starts freaking out. "It's not what it looks like dorm president." Looking back between the two I suddenly feel too much pressure on my right hand that Kaname is holding. Just as the light bulbs burst a sound of pain escapes me. "Owww" I can only hope it sounds like ow. Because that's what I want to say. Kaname quickly let's go of my hand giving me a side look but when we look back at Hanabusa to see him collecting the glass I realize I should never have encouraged that idiot to be so weird. Akatsuki slowly walks out of the room and grabs my left hand pulling me with him. With one look back at Hanabusa and a shake of my head I walk away my head down. Seems like a lot of day students are gonna be going to a funeral real soon.

Akatsuki drops me off at Kaname's room before he goes off elsewhere. Slowly I push the door open and walk in. It takes a while for Kaname to finally come into the room so when he does I have a picture to show him. "Ah, what a lovely picture, you got all three of us in there. Is there a reason we are all on my bed?" Realizing what that could imply my face goes red and I quickly start shaking my head and waving my arms. Stopping suddenly I grab out my normal notebook and start writing. I just needed a back ground and it was easier to draw it since I was looking right at it. Ahhh, it's so weird now that I think of it. Sorry! I go to rip the page out but Kaname beats me to it. "I think I'll need to find a frame that fits this. It's one of your best pieces."

I felt like a kid whose parent put their test on the fridge because they got a good grade. I also felt so appreciated by Kaname. He always knows the right things to say. He just knows me, it seems. When he first found me and Yuki he seemed a bit troubled by me. I didn't know what it was. I never knew. It wasn't like I could eavesdrop on his conversations either. Sometimes I would have Yuki but she wasn't ever any real help. She stopped after the second time we tried spying. I think she heard something she didn't want to hear but I don't know, since the little monster wouldn't tell me.

I remember one night, it was an important night. It made me so confused. I felt so happy after that moment though. Before I was terrified of Kaname but then I made a friend in him. You see, when Kaname had found me and Yuki, it was so cold. Such a terrible night. Our fear was almost solid. I could feel Yuki's fear. When that monster came, I felt like I could hear him, all I could do was watch him. When he went to attack us I could tell he was going towards Yuki. I quickly jumped in front of her and took his attack. He had struck me in the head before he began picking me up by my head. Not even by my hair but my head. It was like he was squeezing my head so tightly that he was able to just hold me by the head. So much blood.

So when Kaname found us, when he killed that monster, I could only cry silently, I was afraid, I was in pain. I didn't know if Kaname would hurt us or if it was all over, if we were safe. When Kaname picked me up with his bloody arm and cradled me, I just felt so scared. Yuki held his hand the whole time, Kaname took us to father. Kaname gave us a chance, a life, a family, each other. Even knowing that though I was afraid of Kaname. He killed that monster. Yes, he saved us but he was stronger than something so scary, if he became scary, who would save us?

I guess that's why father thought I needed to be closer to Kaname because one day we so conveniently were out of everything and he just had to take Yuki with him. I was hiding out in the bathroom, saying I had to poop and shower. It wasn't a good enough lie and they all knew I wasn't doing either when I was in the bathroom when Kaname was over. Father had found my makeshift stake. The movies said wooden stakes killed vampires. Apparently I was a prodigy. I could read so well. Which was very useful since I could hear, or really speak. Yuki was different though. She couldn't even figure out what pudding was or how to put on clothes. I was smart though. So smart. Father always praised me.

I risked coming out of the bathroom because I didn't hear Yuki or father like normal when Kaname is over. My steak was confiscated and so were my other weapons, just before Kaname came over. Slowly I tip toed into the living room, looking around I didn't see anyone other than Kaname. I didn't see blood either, not on him or the house. I took that as a good sign. When I finally looked at Kaname it seemed he knew what I was wondering, he pulled out a paper and pen and started writing. He slid the notebook away from him on the coffee table and over to me. I didn't move toward the coffee table, content with standing where I was.

Curiousity got the best of me. Leaning from where I was towards the coffee table, I tried not moving from my spot. I ended up having to stand on one leg while i put a hand on the table to reach it, all of a sudden I my sock covered foot slips on the rug though and I fall on my butt. Yuki probably would've cried but I just silently sat still for a bit. When I finally went to look at the notebook again. I realized he had took it back to write more. He seemed to have a slight smile on his lips but when he looked up at me his smile went away. He slid the notebook towards me again along with a pencil, this time though he makes it shoot off the coffee table, where it landed right in front of me.

They went to the store. After that a couple lines down, he starts making fun of me. It seems the floor is more likely to hurt you than me or maybe it's gravity that hurt you. Looking up from the notebook I frown at him. Taking the pencil huffily, I start writing. Just be glad gravity didn't attack you, it's mean. Putting the notebook on the coffee table I slide the notebook over to him before turning my head. When I hear him pick it up though I try to watch his reaction from the corner of my eye. His blank look that he get's around me seemed to soften a bit.

When he puts the notebook down I quickly look away but I think he realized I was watching him. He still pushes the notebook to me. Graceful as a ballerina, aren't you? He's making fun of me! Quickly getting up I take the notebook with me and hit him on the arm with it. Pouting I take out the pencil and write a response. Rude! That's not something you say to a girl! You're gonna end up lonely with those kind of comments. Handing him the notebook I cross my arms and wait for him to respond. His brow furrows as he reads what I wrote. With comments like that you're going to end up alone to. You wound me with your words. Reading over his shoulder I roll my eyes.

Instead of just commenting back the first insult to come to mind though I start thinking about what someone would say if they didn't want to offend them but instead comfort them. I'll show him I won't end up lonely. What's something Yuki would say? Oh Kaname I didn't mean it, I would never let you be lonely, you have me. Ew, I'm not saying that. Guess we'll be lonely together than, cause I couldn't even make myself write something to prove you wrong. A weight on my shoulder alerted me to his closeness. When I turn my head my lips end up on his cheek.

Dropping the notebook I flip out and jump away from him and cover my lips. I can feel my face heating up. I just kissed him! It was on the cheek but still! Ewwww, so gross! I'm going to get made fun of in class if anyone ever finds out about this. He seems to be shaking for a second I think he's freaking out like I am but then I realize he was laughing at me. I only realized when his mouth opened and he grabbed onto his sides. It was so weird to see him laughing so hard. Monsters can't laugh so happily like that. Maybe he's not a monster.

When he finally calmed down he picked up the notebook while I glared at him with my arms crossed. He quickly writes a response to me and he gets up and hands it to me before he gave me a smile and patted my head. I will hold you to that. If I am lonely and you are as well we will be lonely together. I had to reread it twice. And who do you think you are? The second you laughed at me you should've realized I was taking back what I said. I'll be lonely by myself before I'll be lonely with you. Throwing the notebook at him I storm off.

Later at dinner father tried to get me to talk to show Kaname my writing and reading skills but I refused. Kaname didn't seem to tell father about our conversation either. After dinner I went straight to my room and went to bed. Not bothering to say bye to him. It wasn't until everyone was asleep that I woke up and went into the living room. I need to burn the evidence so father doesn't know I actually talked to him. I found the notebook stuffed under the cushion where Kaname was sitting, the pencil was inside of it, so opening it, I go to retrieve the pencil only to pause when I see he wrote something to me. Fine be lonely alone, I'll get you to be lonely with me one day, until then how's being a fourth grader?

Every time he visited I would see him take the notebook into the bathroom, hiding the object from Yuki and father. He would read my responses and then answer my questions, when that notebook became full he brought another one, I learned so much about vampire, about his friends, about his life, I think father found out about it but he never said anything to me and Yuki never said anything either, but I know she didn't find it, because I know she would've come running to me with the notebook and she would've been so happy that I was talking to him. Four years of silence, but since then I don't know how I would have opened up to anyone if it wasn't for his simple questions, how was school, what have I been up to, did I cause any trouble, never did he ask about Yuki though, it was always about me.

Snapping out of my memories, I see Kaname putting my picture in a frame, he placed it on his night stand. A slight smile on his face. Turning to me he spoke slowly. "Do you mind if we follow Yuki? She went into town after Zero but I don't think Zero was in the mood for her to follow, you know how she get's scared by herself." Of course, he decides that we should spend our time together, to follow my sister in stead of playing a game or reading in silence, together, just the two of us. It's always the three of us. Looking at the picture of us that I drew Kaname and Yuki were trying to hug me but I was pouting and not responding. Something they both know I would do because I don't like group hugs, to many people.

Writing in my notebook I quickly make sure I breathe. Sure, let's go save the princess from Bowser. He smiles at me, when he gets close to me he puts a hand on top of my head, our eyes locking before I roll my eyes and smile back at him. Taking his hand, we walk out of the dorm and on our way, him leading us as he follows the scent of her blood. With one arm around my waist easily he glides through the town across the rooftops and towards Yuki. We arrive on a board at a bell tower. Seeing my sister so scared. Pulling Yuki to us, I force her head onto my shoulder as I in turn bury my face into Kaname's chest. Not wanting to see what happens and not wanting Yuki to be scarred either.

When Kaname's arm loosens from us I let go of Yuki and back up and take in her appearance. Her hand is hurt, yuki, I'm so sorry. This could've ended up being a lost worse. Yuki could've gotten hurt a lot more or worse ended up dying. It would've been my fault for being selfish too, of course Kaname would put her safety above us hanging out. "Level E?" Yuki starts questioning, what a level E is. I've already learned these things so instead I begin looking around the room. It was as if it led her her. It's the perfect trap. It was so smart. It seemed like just a child. I know Yuki didn't just come up here for no reason.

"Zero is back at the dorms." I see Kaname tell Yuki. Why is he lying to her. Zero never came back. If he didn Kaname would've told me that Yuki went searching for no reason because Zero was back but no he told me how she would get scared and everything. What is he playing at here. "I'll walk you back." Of course he will, looking away from Yuki he looks up at me. I quickly look away, when I look away I spot a hatch. There's my exit. Before I could even make a step towards it though Kaname grabs my arm. I try to pull out of his grip but he doesn't let me and I refuse to look at him.

Yes, he saved Yuki but now he's just doing whatever he can to hang out with her. I don't want to hang out with them both together. If I wanted to do that I would ask Yuki to go with me to the night dorm when I go but I don't and I didn't today either. Sadly, I didn't get a say.


	5. Hanabusa

**Chapter 4: Hanabusa**

Yuki has been acting strange all morning. Deciding to sit beside her I watch her intently, hoping Yori might be able to get something out of her. "I just got cut by a tree branch." Looking around I notice a bandaid on her neck. Looking behind me I notice Zero isn't in his usual spot and at the same time Yuki does too. She's faster than me, since I stop to grab my backpack before running after her. She heads towards the Moon dorm. Immediately confusing me. What happened last night? Did they attack Yuki?! Did Zero try to save her? Did Zero get found out?

Yuki pauses for a second at the gate to get access but she off again before I can catch up. I'm not even sure she knows I followed her. Slowing my run I stop at the gatekeeper and pull out my notebook and pencil. Do you know what happened? He just shakes his head. "All I know is the boy was here too." Zero? Was he willing? "He wasn't being dragged here if that's what you mean." Nodding, I give a tight smile and run off. Two business men are already halfway to the gate when I run past them. When I burst through the doors Yuki is frozen where she stood by Hanabusa. Dropping all of my stuff, I run straight at him, almost tripping I catch myself, by turning the slip into a cartwheel launching myself at him.

Together we fall to the ground. Him, cushioning my fall, as he hits the stairs under him. The ice he had summoned seems to disappear immediately. Raising my fist I pull back to punch him in the face before a large hand grabs my own. Since my one hand was held, I started punching him with my left. I wasn't packing as much punch and I probably wasn't doing much damage but Hanabusa wasn't fighting back. Whether that was because I was attacking him or because Kaname was right behind me. A strong tug on my wrist cause a strong feeling of pain to fill my arm as I was pulled off of Hanabusa. Kaname was glaring at me and Hanabusa. A slight huff left me as I tried to cross my arms and turned my head away from him. When he released me I turned ready to attack Hanabusa only to be surprised as Kaname hit him.

Hanabusa looked from me to Kaname, his eyes never stopping on Yuki even once. Quickly Hanabusa got up and ran up the stairs not looking back. Glancing between Yuki and Kaname, I could tell Kaname was more concerned about Yuki than me. So, I followed Hanabusa. Finding him in his room, I could see my. breathe. I didn't have my notebook or anything but I didn't need it. Turning to face me tears were streaming down his face. "I just don't get what it is about you two! Why does he care so much about you two?! Why not me? His loyal follower?!" So that's what it's about. He always has these outburst after he sees sweet moments between Kaname and Yuki and I guess he's not been venting enough on the side.

It's no excuse for his behavior but I suppose being slapped by someone he admires so much is enough for now. That look of pure hatred in Kaname's eyes, just for Hanabusa surprised even me. I may have been mad but I don't hate him. "What is it about you two? Yuki's blood? Is that it? What about yours? Your blood isn't even enticing! It's like water, no scent, something I need but it doesn't have anything special about it that makes me want it." He was closer now, the air had warmed up, and I wasn't able to see my breath anymore. Looking down at me for a second he suddenly seemed to realize something. "Right, notebook and paper. Here I got some in my drawer from the last time you were here." Looking around as he gets the paper I realize all his precious items are gone.

Turning back the only distance between us was the length of the notebook. Taking it, I take a step backwards. They took all of them? And you haven't tried to take anymore? Shocking. "Har har har, you are so funny Yuzuki. It was all your fault. Along with the other two. I was told to clean and then Kaname happened-" Cutting him off I held up the notebook, with new words. I was there. "Right." He looked away before he moved to sit on his bed. Deciding to push my anger away completely, I sit at the head of his bed, fluffing pillows behind me. Putting a pillow on my stomach I pat it. Hanabusa rolls his eyes and shakes his head but he complies and lays down. Pulling a cover over him and my legs.

Only his head showed. Running my hands through his hair I watch him as he starts talking. "You know, I didn't always like lord Kaname, when I first met him I thought he was so arrogant and controlling and rude." Pausing in my petting I write a joke. So you saw yourself in him? His sour face was enough to make me laugh. "Anyways. I was reading, it was a very hard book. They called me a genius, my sisters that is. When he appeared at the door. No knocking or anything. It was very rude."

"I sensed a child here so I couldn't resist coming up here to see you. Are you a child of this family? I just-" You could say I was shocked, I wasn't expecting anyone to come bother me and I didn't have a clue who this other child was. "Who are you?! You've got no manners! Barging in here!" It wasn't until the words were out of my mouth that I realized someone else had followed him. "Lord Kaname, if you had waited I would have given you a tour." My father had been the one to speak but the two behind him, no words. "I'm sorry I barged in." Kaname had the nerve to apologize to my father but not to me. The one he barged in on.

" No, no, no. It's quite alright. Don't worry. I hope our Hanabusa wasn't rude to you." I was not happy. "Huh? Father! He's the rude one!" I was ready to throw a fit. Kaname stopped me though. "He's right, I haven't been near children my age that much." The two adults now stood closer to him, as if trying to support him silently. "My name is Kaname Kuran." I was shocked once again. To find out such a rude by was a pureblood, I couldn't believe it. "Will you be my friend?"

I didn't even have to think about my answer. "No." I straight up made sure he knew that I didn't want to be friends with such a rude person. I got lectured by so many people that day. How could you do that? How could you say such things? Pureblood this. Pureblood that. My tutor even gave me a lecture on the origins to try and stress their importance and powers. I didn't care though. He even tried to come play with me and my friends. "Good evening." At least his manners had improved slightly. "Hanabusa, may I have a word with you?" Why me? "I'm doing an experiment to test the strength of sand materials right now. I don't want you interfering." I was just trying to get rid of him. He was persistent though.

"It just appears to me that I've done something to make you angry. All I wanted was to apologize so I asked to come back here, I'm truly sorry." I wondered if he was stupid because he hadn't exactly done something wrong. I just didn't like him. I saw large man watching us. Kaname said don't worry but I wasn't worrying. His body guard or watch dog or whatever it was just bothered me. "You don't need to apologize, I just hate you, that's all." Even though he terrifies every one, they still expect a lot from him but he cares for others, much more than I do.

"You know, he changed so much after his parent's died?" Hanabusa's eyes were so sad. How do you mean? "He seemed so much more darker. He threatened my life when I tried to ask if it was something other than suicide. That was the day I admitted my love for him." Your love? "I don't tell you who you have to like but yes my love. Even knowing how unrequited it was, I couldn't help myself. I swear to protect him, even when he changed. A plus side though, it seems to protect him, I have to protect you." And Yuki, with that logic. "Yeah, well that's not a plus side. You, you're a plus side, Yuzuki, you hold a spot in my heart, just like lord Kaname." Whatever. You know you're missing out on getting a good day of sleep right? Let me up so you can get some sleep.

"No. Stay with me. I won't do anything. I promise. Just stay, keep those hate filled eyes out of my mind." He reached out his hand, his pinky extended towards me. Looping my pinky with his I hold up my thumb and we stamp it. Running my hand through his hair, I was surprised to actually find sleep. Surrounded by vampires and still so at peace.

When I wake up Hanabusa is curled up, his head on my chest and his arms around me. The pillow was by the wall. Looking at the door I saw Kaname standing at the door. His expression completely blank. Lifting my right hand I give a slight wave. He turns and leaves the room giving me no response. Attempting to wiggle out from under Hanabusa, I wake him. "No, don't move, so comfortable. To think I almost kept using the pillow. Your boobs are so comfortable though." My face went red before I hit him with the pillow and fought to escape even more. He purposely moved the pillow?! Ugh! He rolls off me letting me escape only for me to fall onto the floor face first before I scrambled to escape.

Shaking my head I stormed off. Past all the other vampires waiting at the door and towards the gate. Where a ton of girls were already waiting. Dangit. Turning all the vampires were walking behind me a distance and Hanabusa was running to catch up with me. Picking up speed I get out the gate fighting any girl that tried to slip past. I help Yuki tame them all.


	6. Confused

**Chapter 5: Confused**

"Zero, I guess he's playing hookie, after earlier, I can't blame him if he is." Yuki and I were sitting on the balcony outside the night class. She seemed to have something on her mind after running about, from what she said I'm guessing she was looking for him. Pulling out my little note pad I take my eyes off her. What happened? Did I miss something. "Well, sort of, it's probably better if you hear it from Zero though!" She seemed to be freaking out about something. That's right. She had bite marks on her the other day and the only one who could've bit her would've been Zero. She doesn't know I know. Did something happen? Besides you finding out Zero was a vampire? Maybe it's just that she found out.

"You knew?! And didn't tell me?!" You just told me it was something I should hear from Zero. Does that not apply to you too? Talk about double standards. "Oh, well, I guess you are right. Sorry." I was not amused. Yuki scratched the back of her neck awkwardly, that's when I noticed the bracelet. Where did you get that?! "What? Oh the bracelet? The headmaster gave it to me. It's to help keep Zero in line I guess." I couldn't even describe the feeling of hurt I got from that. Yuki doesn't understand the full commitment of that bond. I do. I would do whatever it took to keep Zero safe. Now Zero doesn't get a choice of his life. He'll have to do whatever Yuki decides to do with her life because Yuki is the only one that can keep him from losing his humanity.

Yuki and Zero are now tied to each other. I have to go to the bathroom. Watch them? Before Yuki could respond I was off to see our father. Slamming the door open I wasn't surprised when he instantly tried to hug me. Actually, I broke the norm. I punched, as hard as I could, right in the nose. Immediately blood flowed from him. His childish behavior instantly coming to a stop, as time seemed to slow, and his glasses flew off him. The dark expression would have sent chills through me if I hadn't known who he really was. A vampire hunter. Trained to kill, he didn't see them as creatures with hearts before, before he was just a heartless beast to their kind killing without even wondering if they have a heart of their own.

Why is Yuki bonded to him? It took me several tries, since I kept ripping the paper. "Kaname said the only way for Zero to stay in the day class is for him to be bonded to her. He attacked Yuki the other night. We can not let his behavior slip." Picking up his glasses he wipes them off. Why not bind him to me? Why did it have to be Yuki? "You know just as well as I do why that is. Her blood is like a drug, so intoxicating to them, yours," shaking his head he pauses. "It's like you don't have blood. You won't always be there to tame him but if he goes crazy, I'm willing to bet it will be around Yuki, not you." A staring contest was issued between us before the headmaster broke it and put his glasses on. "Now! Yuzuki, you don't need to be jealous. This just means you, Zero, and Yuki will always be inseparable!"

He moves to give me a hug but I storm out of his office. Yuki this, Yuki that, it's always her. I'm deaf! Why don't I have people caring for me like they do her?! Maybe if I wasn't deaf I'd have boys banging on my door just to have my attention like poor ol Yuki does. Poor defenseless, hears everything, Yuki. I'm tired of this! Of all of this! I never asked for this! I never wanted to be here! Why am I here?!

All of a sudden the hallway starts spinning. I see the floor coming to greet me but I can't move my arms to help me. I can't feel anything. That's the last thing I remember before darkness consumes me. Darkness. I thought no noise was traumatizing. Am I deaf and blind now too? What about moving? Why can't I move? Why can't I do anything but think? Is that a light? How am I supposed to go towards the light if I can't move?

All of a sudden the light comes rushing up to me consuming me in it's white glow. All my senses returned to me. I found myself in a hospital room. It was weird though. I wasn't the one in the hospital bed. It was another person. An older lady, she seemed so peaceful. Slowly sitting up, I look around the room. It looked so familiar, yet not like anything I've ever seen before. I've never been to a hospital. So why does this seem familiar? The old lady seemed to stir in her sleep as if she had sensed my presence. "Oh my dear, you shouldn't be here you should be at school." My eyes went wide and everything in me screamed. I could hear her. This lady's voice resonated with me. She was the voice in my head. I didn't know what my own voice sounded like but this was the voice that narrated everything I thought.

"Hey, don't look so scared. I promise I won't bite. You are my gift from the stars. I wouldn't hurt you, Yuzuki." Looking around I searched for a pencil and paper but found none. I feel the need to ask her question but I don't know how. "Darling, speak to grandmama." Her words compelled me. "How do you know me?" The words were said unsurely and slowly. I wanted to make sure I pronounced everything right, the scratchy voice that came from me almost made me stop talking. That wasn't my voice, was it? "Why you're my granddaughter. Why wouldn't I know you?" A little twinkle seemed to spark in her eyes. "You made a wish didn't you sweetheart? That makes so much sense now. You wouldn't skip school and make me worry like that."

"A wish?" My voice seemed to get better. Which was weird. Voices take training after such long silences, right? "That's right. Here, drink this water on my night stand. I don't want it." Hesitantly I get up to get the water. I was so confused but what could an old lady in a hospital bed possibly do to some water. "So what wish did I make?" The old lady seemed amused. "I don't know but it probably has something to do with fixing that lost voice of yours." "I didn't lose my voice." I replied confused. She didn't know anything did she? "Then why was it as if you haven't used your voice in years?"

"I've been deaf for as long I can remember. I don't like using my voice. It makes me feel ignored or I get looks of pity that I don't want. I avoid confusion by just writing everything." Standing beside the lady now I put the water down. Her hand seems to do a small shuffle before she picks it up slowly and reaches out to me. I take her hand and suddenly my brain is filled with a ton of thoughts and images, it all goes by to fast but even through it all I hear her words very clearly. "Something happened to make you go deaf here, so when you made your wish you were sent to where ever because that is where you will get your hearing back. Don't lose hope. Whatever caused you to lose your hearing will be undone when you go through a bunch of trails and solve whatever problem you got. Like some stupid lesson learning adventure. It's the price to find your happiness though. I did that same thing and found your grandfather. One day your kid will do it to, it's a family gift and curse."

A shaking feeling brought me out of whatever headache I was experiencing. When I came to I was in the arms of Zero and he was practically running through the halls, Yuki was right next to him. For a second I could've sworn I heard someone but before I could pinpoint it I was out. " _She lost a lot of blood. It looked like she didn't even try to catch herself."_ I couldn't have heard that though. I don't hear things. I can't. So why did I think I did? Maybe it was because of some weird dream. I don't want to think about it. So why can I not stop thinking about it while I sit in the nurse's office in one of the medical beds? All of a sudden I see the curtain being moved and a man in a nurses office steps into my line of sight. "Glad you're awake."

Still deaf, I didn't hear the curtains slide on the metal and I didn't hear him. Nodding silently I look around the room. The man stepped closer though as if trying to get my attention. "Your father said that you could be released when you woke up, and it just so happens you have a couple of guest waiting for you." Expecting Zero and Yuki to be there I was shocked when the curtain moved even more to revel Hanabusa and Akatsuki, I wasn't happy with Yuki and Zero for them not staying with me. "You're sister and that loser were invited to a party, we figured we were allowed to extend that invitation to you as well." Hanabusa says, as if he's trying to swoon me. I just roll my eyes at him. "Honestly the whole thing will be more bearable if you are there. No one will try anything on Zero if you're there." Is it sad that a part of me hoped Akatsuki was wrong?

Like I don't want to see any of them fighting but Zero needs to be hit a few good times in my opinion, right now. The doc or nurse or whatever hands me a note pad and a pencil. Looking at it I realize it was mine. Useful. Sure, I'll probably leave pretty early though. I'm honestly not wanting to be around either right now. "Who really wants to be around those two?" Hanabusa asked me, earning an elbow to his side and a small smile from me. Whatever, so when's this party? "It's already started, we figured Yuki and Zero would be late so we'd get you once it started." Nodding, I get out of the bed I was in and move over to the two boys. I was a bit wobbly. I was probably even worse off when Hanabusa suddenly swooped me up in his arms and started carrying me bridal style. My head was practically spinning.

When the world stopped spinning I noticed Hanabusa looking down at me with a sheepish grin. "Sorry, you're moving too slow. If you're leaving when they get to the party then we have limited time to spend together. Plus, got to spend time with you before Kaname realizes you are there and he tries to take you away." Shrugging off his comment I just let it slide and the walk to the moon dorm was actually pretty entertaining. I was constantly looking from Hanabusa and Akatsuki like they were in a tennis match but it was worth it because of their conversation. Akatsuki was making fun of Hanabusa and Hanabusa was pouting or trying to annoy him.

I wonder if Hanabusa has an annoying voice. Maybe the girls put up with it because of his looks? Hey, Akatsuki, does Hanabusa have an annoying voice? Serious question. Passing the note over I avoid letting Hanabusa look at it. Akatsuki looks from me to Hanabusa and then back to me. "No. Its tolerable." Smiling I nod. Akatsuki crumbles up the paper and sets it aflame, a small smile barely noticeable on his face. So fire and Ice? I write letting Hanabusa read it. How do complete opposite powers run in your alls family? You two are cousins right? "Highly classified information." Hanabusa says after looking all around us like someone was going to find out he was even telling me it was classified.

It took me a bit to even realize when we finally got to the party since Hanabusa and Akatsuki gave no indication that we were here or that Hanabusa was still carrying me even though he now had no reason to. When I finally realized I started struggling against Hanabusa's hold. Noticing him and Akatsuki laughing, the thought that they were pulling a joke on me because I'm deaf floated around and me being me, I latched onto it and let anger control me as I stormed off away from them. Stupid boys being jerks. I couldn't get rid of Hanabusa though and I guess it didn't take him long to realize why I was upset, so he started getting in my face and word by word explaining that he was only laughing because I was fighting so hard to escape him and he wasn't even holding onto me besides having his arms straight out to support me.

Which I guess makes more sense, because if they were going to waste their time bullying me they wouldn't have wasted their time being my friend in the first place. Sadly, that meant I wasted most of the time I had to hang out with him. I only realized that when a Ruka comes over to me and Hanabusa and tells us that Kaname wanted to speak with me. The look on her face seemed to say she found amusement in saying he wanted to speak with me. Rolling my eyes at her I follow her into the dorm, where she leads me to his room, leaving me at the door, she walks away not even telling me if I can go in or not. Taking my chances I bang on the door a couple times, to announce myself before I step into the room.

"Come over here. Let me see what I can do about that scratch." Confused, I look at my arms and legs patting myself down before Kaname walks over to me and pulls a giant bandaid off of my cheek. How did I not notice that? What I did notice was when I felt something wet on my face, eyes wide as I realized he just licked my cheek! About to push him away, I'm surprised when he wraps his arms around me and held me in place. His lips rested by my ear, barely touching it but within seconds I am in for another shock. " _If only you could hear my worry, and know how I wanted to run to you."_ Quickly I turn my head, hitting him with my head. Not, smart. Ow. The pain making me temporarily forget I heard him.

"What's wrong?" My eyes were wide as I stared at him. I heard him. Not when he asked what's wrong but when he whispered into my ear. I heard him! Scrambling for my notebook, I begin to write I heard, but before I could finish I passed out and dropped like a rag doll, pencil and notebook going their separate ways. The events with an old lady consumed my mind. I was talking to her, it was like a seen from a movie, but I didn't have any control over it. It was me she was talking to, but it wasn't me that was answer, but at the same time it was. It was like I was viewing a memory but I couldn't make sense of it.

When I woke up I was in Kaname's bed. No one was around though and according to my vampire radar, none were in the building either, Zero was close though. I must've not been out long. I need to leave now. Moving through the dark room I kick something with my foot but I ignore it as I try to find the door. It takes a bit and the whole time I'm fumbling like crazy, my dream still playing through my mind. What's going on? That lady can't be my Grandma, could she be? But that never happened to me. Barefooted and still in my uniform I continue making my way out the front door, no one stopped me and no one vampire even knew I was escaping. I needed to go to bed anyways. Plus, no one will care, I mean, Yuki is here now. They don't need to mean knock off version, Yuzuki.

At the gate I pause a pounding in my head causes me to stop walking and sit where I was, hoping to avoid passing out again, that's right I passed out after I head Kaname, the dizzy feeling grew more intense and I passed out again. This time was different. There was no hospital room, this time there was a small child's room, a crib on one side and a toddler bed on the other. In the crib a baby seemed to cry, but the toddler bed was empty, the door out of the room was open so looking out into the hallway I spot light coming from a room at the end. Walking down the hall I stayed close to the wall. Looking into the room, I see three people sitting in front of a TV, as the crying got louder, so did that TV. "If Yuzuki really means hope, then I hope she'll shut up soon." A man said shaking his head, it seems he reached his limit on turning up the volume. A small child nodded her head in agreement, while a lady, just chided the two. "Don't get into a habit of saying those things when no one's around, you don't want to slip up and say them when people are around."

Walking back to the room where the baby was, I tried making silly faces at the baby, but nothing worked, finally I tried reaching down but instead of the baby grabbing my finger, her little hand passed through it. The shock seemed to knock me back to my senses because I was back in front of the gate of the moon dorm. Getting up slowly, I recall what that couple said, "If Yuzuki means hope…" Yuzuki. That was the baby's name but that's my name. Shaking the thoughts from my head I trudge on to the closest place that I can be alone, my room in the head masters house.

I didn't even make it past the front door when I collapsed again, there wasn't any baby crying this time though, now it was a child. Maybe 4 years old. "No! You don't get to play with those toys! What your mother got you is what you got! So you have nothing! Don't touch that!" A little girl no older that 7 was yelling these things at the 4 year old. No seven year old would yell things like that unless the parent's did! What kind of parent's are these people?! They'll dot on one child but not the other?! "What is wrong with you?!" A old gentler voice cried out, looking at the door I saw a less fragile old woman there. The one that called me her granddaughter. "What? It's true, it's what mom and dad say all the time. You don't get to say anything old lady, you're to crazy to be allowed to take care of her." This seven year old was getting on my nerves.

"I'm only crazy because that's the only way I'm allowed to beat the crap out of your parent's girly, I apparently didn't teach your mother right when I was raising that little beast. She doesn't even know how to treat her niece right, and she let's you treat her terribly as well. When you all get your wishes I hope you reach the very bottom before you even come close to climbing back up the ladder of happiness, I want you all to suffer in the land of wishes and know it's all because you're terrible people." Damn granny's got anger. "Whatever, go back to your nursing home." Snatching the seven year old by the wrist the granny gave the little girl the spanking she deserved. "Bad words that cause pain leave your mouth so pain shall be what you feel." The granny told her before turning the crying seven year old into a corner.

"Now Yuzuki, come with me. You get to spend the weekend with me. I know it's not long but trust me, it will make all these tolerable, I promise to spoil you rotten when you are with me, it's the least I can do since I can't save you from them." The old lady reached out her hand to the young four year old that just watched her anger episode, it surprised me when the little one quickly took the lady's hand. I guess she knows who really care. Yuzuki. My name is her name. I wonder if father has some pictures of me when I was five, I need to see them now. If I tell him why though he'll ask questions, that even I don't know the answers to.

With those thoughts on my mind the doorway I was in when the vision came on, was brought back to me. Crawling a few steps before I risked standing up, I kick the door closed before I slowly pull myself up using the couch closest to me. Walking to the bookshelf I lean on it already feeling another wave coming on. Flipping quickly flashes of me and Yuki together pass by in a slight blur. Slowly I come to a stop on a photo labeled at the bottom, bath time with Yuzuki. We're the same.

I didn't have time to put up the book before I dropped to the ground again. This time I knew I wouldn't be waking up anytime soon. Something just told me that I was not about to enjoy any of what I was about to go through.


	7. No love

**Chapter 6: No love**

"You know Yuki, you keep talking about Zero not being in class, but did you even realize that Yuzuki wasn't in class either?" Yori, my closest and dearest friend, she might've been my roommate but I couldn't tell her the truth about Zero or the night class. The secret of this school was only shared with a select few. "Yuzuki probably just slept in. You know how she is. Just like Zero when it comes to not caring about all things school wise." I brushed it off. Now's not the time to worry about Yuzuki when Zero was just attacked by someone who claims to have been his master.

"I'm going to go stop by Zero's room see if he's there." Before I can run off though, Yori grabs my arm. "Yuki, you just blew off your sister's disappearance as if it was no big deal, but you'll go check on Zero?" She seemed genuinely concerned but she just doesn't understand, even if I have to look like a bad sister, it's important I check on Zero. "Well, it's just that I know Yuzuki would get upset with me if I didn't check on him first. Why don't you go check up on her and after I find Zero we can all hang out like normal." It's best to act like everythings fine. "Alright. I'll leave a note in the room when I find her." Yori was so sweet, I knew she didn't fully like my response but she just wanted to help.

It didn't matter where I looked, I couldn't find him. I started with his room, then the stable, I asked other classmates, but no luck, even during the switch I didn't see Zero, I didn't see Yuzuki either. Yori's words echoed in my head and I started to feel concerned. Was there something about Yuzuki that I didn't know either? She didn't tell me about Zero, what else has she not told me about? Finally, I decided the best line of action is to confront the one causing the commotion. On his way to class I will stop him. He will answer my questions, or my name's not Yuki!

Stopping him in his tracks was easy. Grabbing onto his coattail, it was to easy. I should've expected he'd know I was waiting for him. "What happened to Zero? Did you do something to him?" My questions might've been demanding and rude but I didn't care. I was just worried about Zero. "We quarantined him, of course." He was to calm and emotionless about all this. If Zero was his student he shouldn't be okay with this."Quarantined?!" "He's at a point where he could attack somebody at any given moment now. This way I can at least deal with him properly without the risk of there being any more victims." "What's going on? Is Zero safe for now? Is he alright? I want to know where he is." He pulls his coattail out of my hands."Let go of me. I have more pressing matters to attend to. Your idiot headmaster keeps making my life miserable. He has me teaching ethics to the night class now, what a joke." He begins to walk away towards the classroom. "Wait!" I couldn't bring myself to stop him once he got to the door. "Go do your own job."

If Zero's master wasn't enough of a handful, Kaname Senpai had to walk by to and remind me of the issues I've caused."You know Yuki, I haven't seen Zero at all today. For his own good, you should reconsider your request his place is in the night class." I just wanted to help Zero though, but it seems I've only made things worse. Yuzuki wouldn't have messed up like this. Yuzuki would've been stubborn about this. So that's what I'll do. I'll be stubborn about this. I'll wait here till he comes out and make him tell me.

I wasn't expecting him to have been attacked in class. I was shocked to see a knife in the book but he's a big bad vampire hunter so he doesn't need my concern. "You're still here?" "I'm not moving from this spot until you tell me where it is you put Zero." "Try as you may there is nothing a good girl like you can do for him now but if you still insist on seeing him, go right ahead. You can find him in the headmaster's guest room, looking after the sister you seem to have forgotten about." Yuzuki?! Quickly I turn tail and run for the head masters house. I should've checked there. Why didn't I think of that? Why is Zero looking after Yuzuki? What happened? Is she a vampire too? Did I miss something? Was it because I'm always so consumed with thoughts of Kaname that I didn't notice my own sister was no longer my sister?

Bursting through the room the sight in front of me caused me so much confusion. Zero, he was holding Yuzuki down, as if he was about to pounce. "Zero! No! You can drink from me! You don't need to do this to her if she doesn't want you to!" But my words fell on deaf ears as I tried to fight him off her. It was too late for me to take back my words. "Is that what you think of me Yuki? That I would lower myself to forcing myself on Yuzuki while she has seizures?" The look in Zero's eyes was of hate, but as his eyes moved away from me and landed back on Yuzuki only concern filled them. "What?" The words could barely escape me. "Yuki, I think you need to go to your dorm. It seems Yori is in need of a friend right now." The voice shocked me. It was Kaname, who stood at the doorway, he heard me offer Zero my blood. "Kaname."

"Yuki, go to your dorm room now." Kaname made his words final. I had no room to fight him. I didn't want to make them both hate me. I didn't want to make this all about me right now. Yuzuki is, she is, she's not well. Glancing at her as her body compulsed causing a choked sob to escape me but I ran out of the room, knowing I was not welcomed. I ran for my dorm, he said Yori would need a friend. I will be there for her. "Yori! I'm here! I saw Yuzuki!" I rushed in hoping to find my friend and find out what she knew. Instead I found Yori and a few other girls that Yuzuki would hang out with at lunch. The girls that helped her in class occasionally. With sad looks they looked between me and Yori. "We'll leave you two alone." Yori nodded, she wouldn't make eye contact with me.

When the last of the three girls left and the door closed I was unsure what to do. It seemed like Yori didn't want me here. "So how was Zero? Was he okay?" "Yori, don't be like that, you don't know what's been going on." Letting out a sigh Yori shook her head before she finally turned to look at me. "I get it! Okay, I get that you really care for Zero and Kaname and that you can't get your feeling straight but are you really going to let those feelings cloud what's really important to you? Or are guys the only thing you can care about now? You and Yuzuki used to have sleepovers every night, I don't know what happened but you barely pay her any attention. It's no wonder she didn't tell you that anything was wrong. You know there's usually warning signs for these thing! Did you notice them? I noticed. I noticed how she began to act differently. I noticed she wasn't in class today and I noticed when her sister didn't even care!"

"That's not true! I noticed her! She pushed me away! She always has! She doesn't love me! I love her!" Yori wasn't listening to me though. I was right though! She didn't! "Don't make this about you. This world does not revolve around you. This is not your tv show and you are not the star. This is the real world and Yuzuki is really not well!" Yori got up from her bed and gathered all her stuff. "I'm sleeping with a friend for a few nights. Come find me when you decide to stop being so selfish for love."


	8. Real Life

**Chapter 7: Real life**

"You know it's amazing, she shouldn't be able to hear at all. Every medical note, every doctor before, every sign, led to her never being able to hear again. How she was able to hear again I don't actually know." The man in the white coat adjusted his glasses. He was the third doctor my aunt and uncle had brought me to. It was obvious they did not like these answers. I went to bed not being able to hear and woke up able to hear. I couldn't talk properly but the doctors all said the same things, I just needed to work on sounds. Then the words would come to me. "No, you don't understand. We have been putting money into her." Meaning they have been getting money for me that's supposed to help me but now they won't get it. "All these extra things that kept ends from meeting." My aunt means her gambling can't be afforded if she doesn't get my social security check that she gets every month.

My uncle pushes his wife away from the doctor. "What my wife is trying to say is that this is not how going deaf works. I'm not a doctor but I do know that this is not normal, there could be something more wrong with her. Please, do more research." Are they really this desperate for me to be deaf or for them to have that extra cash, that money was supposed to be spent on me, for them getting me help for me to get things that they can afford because I need attention, instead it's used for everything but me. I don't know how they never got caught. They should have been by now, they're to dumb to have not been caught. I guess it was just gran that kept them from trouble. Somehow I truly believe gran could save them.

Suddenly a sharp pain struck me right behind my ears. A loud ringing seemed to encompass me. The pain was so intense I dropped to the floor, clutching my ears for dear life as I curled around myself and fought against the doctors prying hands. I don't know what was being said. I do know that during the one moment I was able to open my eyes I could see my aunt smirking but just as soon as my eyes opened they closed and with the closing of my eyes I lost consciousness. Flashes of me visiting gran filled my mind. I never visited gran then though. She never spoke those words to me. Why can't I control what I was saying?

It seems forever before I gather what's going on and when I do I'm freaked out. It wasn't a dream. No, it wasn't. I did have that talk with gran. It seemed like a lifetime began to flash through my eyes or at least the life that I had lived. I was actually in Vampire knight? One of my most favorite animes. I was with Kaname and Zero, I had friends, I had a family that cared about me. I had an actual life in Vampire Knight and now I was back here with these ungrateful people that could never even show me an ounce of love.

What baffles me so much though is knowing how miserable I was when I was with the people that loved me more than anything. I was so rude and mean to them like I wish I could be to my aunt and uncle but the characters never treated me like my actual flesh and blood. Where does that make sense? Where does any of this make sense? Hell, I had Kaname and Zero in the palm of my hand and I couldn't even see it. I was worse than Yuki. At least she was constantly telling herself she loved Kaname. She didn't even realize when she fell for Zero and you got me over here saying she's selfish and yet I'm the boy crazy one here. I'm pathetic. I'm ruining the show! I mean what do I expect to happen? I'm not even a vampire. I'd grow old and nothing could ever last with either of them. Not even Hanabusa would want me.

Oh. My. God. I have three guys in my life that would do anything for me and all I do is push them and everyone else in my life away. WHY DID I NOT REALIZE THESE THINGS?! Is it because I grew up in a loving family and didn't suffer through all this that I really don't know how to see life how it is. Yuki. I pushed her away when I got jealous that her world is just following it's original script. I didn't push her away as much as she sometimes did me but I feel like I shouldn't have done it either. I feel like a god though. I went into another world and was actually living there! Wait. I was living there. Why did I come back? Gran said all I had to do was wish. Did I not wish enough? Was-that's right, I was regretting my life there. I didn't want it. I questioned it. I got myself kicked out.

"She's regaining consciousness. Bring the police officers in here so they can talk to her." Police officers? What are they gonna do? I couldn't sit up. I couldn't even bring myself to move my head up. When I tried my head rolled to the side. Forcing my eyes open was even more work but it was important. When I opened them two guys in suits were right in front of me. "Yuzuki, we need to ask you a few questions. See we noticed a few things that most people never noticed when you collapsed and-" The doctor stopped talking I couldn't focus my eyes and they felt so heavy. I didn't want to be awake. "Can you hear me? Or did you go deaf again?" Oh. Right. That was a thing wasn't it?

Staring at him with my eye lids hanging so low I probably looked stoned I attempted to nod. That seemed to be enough. "Alright good. Well Obviously you won't be able to answer any questions right now but these men just want you to listen and nod and tomorrow they will come back and repeat all the questions. You have scars on your body that you should have had treated at a hospital but it looked as if you got them healed by having them burned. That is not proper procedure and it looks as if your family actually tortured you." I had no idea what this guy was talking about but I mean I just nodded.

Before I knew it I was in a special needs foster placement. That was the only way I could describe it. My cousin was in a different home, my aunt and uncle, they were in jail, and I was almost able to fully talk. It was crazy ridiculous and I had no idea what was happening. I was completely confused. Occasionally, I would end up in the hospital due to the ringing in my ears. It was so painful but I realized it was like I was being called back to the Vampire Knight world. I had been watching the anime over and over again, trying to see if I was in in, I looked everywhere but I wasn't. Maybe it was just a really vivid dream. Maybe that was an alternate Vampire knight world where I didn't exist.

When I found no changes I went searching to see if other people had ever experienced these kinds of things before. I came across a bunch of things that didn't make sense and then a bunch of fanfiction that was just that, fiction. I must have seemed like a nut case to all the authors I messaged, when I asked if their stories were based off of true events. I mean do you know how many people actually have written fanfiction that started off with a simple wish on a star? It almost made my real life seem cliche as can be.

My research didn't stop there. Why would it? I mean there was fanfiction out there in the world. I was an avid reader of and I knew I had to search the records. There has to be something. I need some kind of confirmation that this existed. That I actually was there. I kept coming up empty handed. The craziest part about it all though? I got a direct message, on my own story, someone claiming I was copying another writer. Which is where I finally found the proof that I existed somewhere. I asked this person so many questions they actually started to get mad at me. They truly thought I was trying to steal from another person. It actually kind of pissed me off.

Here I was a girl that just wanted to go back to the place that made her happiest. Yeah, sure, I was doing a lot better no that I was away from my aunt and uncle but I had lived a completely different life surrounded by people that I couldn't help but care about and now there was no one in this world that could ever make me stop missing them. I wanted them back. So, I contacted the author, awesomeanimelover98, I was honestly very disappointed in their name choice. A link is all I got in response. I read up on what they posted and I tried to find out where I was in there story line but I just didn't know what happened next. They stopped right before I got back here. Like they didn't know what happened next. The only response I got? A link. That sent me to a flipping peeled orange. Like what the hell?!

I stared at it for hours completely confused. Not sure what it meant. Every day I would check back to see if they updated or if they sent another message. After a month passed I found myself in the hospital again, the ringing had returned, this time I was conscious though. Some part of me made me go and click on the link. The second I did though. The pain increased. It seemed to spread out. My brain was going to explode. I was going to die. This was the moment of truth. I was going to die. I would never get back to my father, to Yuki, I would never see Yori again, feel Kaname's hand on my head, see Zero's small smiles, or see Hanabusa's art.

* * *

 **Author's note: So I have been trying not to write these because when I see them when I'm reading other fanfictions, it bothers me, but I wanted to let everyone know I was thankful for the follows and favorites and the reviews. They make me so happy. I had finals so I was busy studying-ish but please keep reviewing and everything I appreciate all of you and hope you all have a good day. :D**


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